Flying solo isn’t really my thing. In a huge crowd, I feel lonely and awkward by myself. No, actually, I just hate being in a huge crowd. I feel like being in it is draining my energy and, sometimes, I feel like I’m going to drown. That’s why I’ve been scared to do things solo up until last night.
I decided to change myself. And so, I made a decision to go solo in an event (stage performance, to be exact) to watch.
Originally, I invited people to go with me. I wanted to go with people because as I said, I was scared and didn’t want to go alone. However, when I asked, I wasn’t able to get an okay from them. Some said it looks cool and left it at that. Some had other plans to do. Some thought it’s not worth paying the money. Some weren’t interested. But, since I really wanted to watch the performance, why not do it solo? Right?
Forget being scared. Forget being awkward. I needed to grow. I needed to change.
And, flying solo is another step in doing just that.
Last night, 11th March 2016 at the Arad Fort, Akram Khan performed a dance called “Kaash“.
Kaash is a Hindi word for “if only” (When I learned about this, I laughed. Is it trying to match with my life right now?) It is a contemporary dance with beautiful and powerful choreography. From what I read, the choreography is divided into three parts which was based on Shiva’s nature — violence, goodness, and the never ending cycle of creation and destruction (death, birth, rebirth).
Do you know who Shiva is? Shiva is one of the major deities of Hinduism. Basically, Shiva is a god in Hindu mythology. This is one of the reasons why I wanted to watch Kaash so bad. I like these gods and goddesses thing and I couldn’t help but be interested in this performance.
Fun fact: I first encountered the word Shiva in a game called Final Fantasy. And, oh boy, I loved summoning her.
Before the day of the performance, I tried to research about the story behind the dance but I failed and gave up right away. I was like, “It’s a dance. I just need to watch it.” And, you know what? I regret thinking that way.
While I was watching, I tried to understand what the dance was portraying. You know what I got? It seems to me that they were lovers and, next, it seems like everyone’s fighting. Then, they fall and get back up again. I couldn’t follow and I cried internally. I was so confused trying to understand what was happening. So, upon reaching home, I tried to search the story behind it. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to find any.
Then, I searched about Shiva. From there, I think I kind of understand it now. The part where they looked like lovers must be portraying Shiva’s never ending selfless service to Ram or maybe it’s his love for his wife, Parvati. Or both. I don’t know, really. The parts where they looked like they were fighting must be portraying Shiva’s violence. And, the part where they fall and get back up again must be portraying death and rebirth.
If I did all these research before, I wouldn’t be sitting there with my eyebrows trying to meet at the middle like two lovers who were forcefully separated by society (I don’t know, whatever).
The dance was really great. Although I had difficulty watching it as a whole because one’s dance was different from the other, I enjoyed it very much.
I have never seen a powerful dance look so graceful. Their movements depict strength yet the way they moved their arms, as if it was a gentle wave, made me watch them in awe.
The choreography had lots of slicing the air, arms moving diagonally, spinning, twisting, dropping and rolling on the floor, standing up, walking, sprinting, punching, jumping, more spinning, and more rolling on the floor. Take note, everything was done with so much strength. At first, I thought they were having seizures and I found it weird. Obviously, the thought went away afterwards.
I liked their costumes as well. I don’t know what they call it though. Is it alright for me to call it a long skirt? Well, you see, it was so long and it flutters and twirls whenever the performers are moving. I guess it’s one of the factors why it looked so graceful too.
The performance ended with all five of them taking a bow. I clapped and clapped and decided to stay there until it was less crowded. However, I changed my mind.
Bandart was there as well to give a free performance. Of course, I wouldn’t want to miss it. So, I went along with the crowd’s flow and hurriedly looked for a spot to watch them. I’m short, okay? I had to go squeeze myself in order to get in front.
Bandart performed “Dancing Graffiti” where someone dances and another draws. Both were performed live and all of us were entertained by the lady’s dance and the man’s doodles which was projected through the projector. They made it look like the lady was dancing with the doodles. It was cute!
Bandart came from Hungary and I was amazed by the fact that the software they used, in order to make the doodles move, was made by the man who was doodling himself. Basically, everything was made by them. If you want to check them out, you can visit Bandart.eu or their Facebook page \bandart. (I hope I remembered it correctly)
Lastly, there was an open air café but I didn’t bother trying it out. No, it’s not because I was scared and not because I felt lonely. It was because I thought I’d save my money since I already spent a lot for the ticket. I cry but it was worth it.
The experience I had last night was simply amazing! I never thought that flying solo can make me feel so calm and peaceful. I didn’t have to consider someone’s feelings; whether they liked the show or not. I didn’t have to worry about someone being bored. I only had to think of myself and what to do next.
Of course, it would have been a lot of fun if I was with someone who shares the same interest. But, for now, learning to enjoy it by myself is good too.